BDSM is an acronym misunderstood by many. Standing for bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism, it’s an erotic practice that covers a vast spectrum of experiences and expressions.
In the community, there’s Goddess Seira, whose journey into BDSM is not only a personal exploration but also a professional calling. We dive into her experiences, beliefs, and the profound psychological layers that define BDSM, shedding light on its misconceptions and offering a glimpse into the life of someone who has made dominance a full-time pursuit.
Originally from Korea and now residing in London, Goddess Seira started her journey by hypnotizing a partner at the time. Hooked, she began exploring other avenues of pleasure.
She dedicated herself to learning the safety protocols and honing her practice by taking proper workshops before starting her business. A year and a half later, she became a full-time Dominatrix who today blends feminine energy with the practices of gentle and sensual domination, cock and ball torture (CBT), ball busting, foot fetish, whipping, and humiliation.
Foot fetish plays a significant role in her dominatrix repertoire. She uses her "very pretty, small feet" as instruments of domination and humiliation, emphasizing the power dynamics at play when men are positioned at the lowest point, literally at her feet.
Because the cock and balls are supreme symbols of masculinity, CBT and ballbusting are the physical manifestation of breaking them down. It’s a powerful sensation to crush the male ego and dominance, according to Goddess Seira.
Goddess Seira believes in the strength and power of Feminine Energy. She delights in using her sensuality and femininity to manipulate and control men—one of her favorite moments is watching them grow weaker under her Feminine Power. She knows that true dominance doesn’t require aggression or shouting; instead, Feminine Energy is the perfect tool to dominate men.
Goddess Seira was born with a naturally dominant trait, and she takes great pleasure in expressing this side through her work. Her role also allows her to explore a wide variety of fetishes with different individuals, which continuously stimulates her curiosity and creativity. Many men have repressed their submissive desires, and it’s unfortunate they feel the need to hide this part of themselves. Goddess Seira loves helping her clients uncover and embrace their submissive side, something they often can’t express in their daily lives. She frequently hears from men how frustrating it is to keep that side of themselves hidden, and they deeply appreciate the opportunity to explore it with her.
Goddess Seira wishes people understood the psychological aspects of BDSM. It goes far beyond the sexual. To engage in it, you must build self-awareness.
For example, when a client submits an inquiry, Goddess Seira sends a questionnaire to understand their triggers, what they have in mind and want to explore, and really take the time to think about themselves.
They need to be willing to try different things, because without trying, they won’t know what they’ll like and what their triggers are. It’s also crucial to appreciate the dynamic of power exchange. For Goddess Seira to enjoy the practice, she must practice mental control.
For couples curious about wetting their toes into BDSM, environment matters. She recommends having a hook next to the entrance with a collar and leash, for example.
Routines that establish a dominant-submissive dynamic in everyday life, like having your partner kiss your feet every morning and before going to bed. Or simple tasks like washing the dishes by a specific time, or else they’ll be punished.
It’s important to set realistic expectations around your schedule, because if there’s too much to do, they’ll get overwhelmed and frustrated.
It goes without saying, clear communication and consent is paramount to making it work. Discuss boundaries, desires and the pace at which both partners are comfortable evolving their dynamic. Most of all, be patient.
If you want to learn more, you can check out her Instagram, LoyalFans, and clips for purchase.
Every week sexologist Natassia Miller offers tips, strategies and resources to improve your sex life and relationship.
Every week sexologist Natassia Miller answers anonymous questions and offers advice to improve your sex life and relationship.
